As one of the co-founders of Living Well With Dementia Sisters, I wanted to share my very first post from my personal Meta (Facebook) page here. My husband and I have been together for over 30 years, sharing a life full of love and challenges. In 2013, he was diagnosed with short-term memory issues, followed by a diagnosis of mixed dementia and Alzheimer's in 2016.
For the past six years, I’ve been his primary care partner, walking alongside him as we navigate the progression of this disease together. Through this blog, I hope to share our journey and offer insight, connection, and support to others on similar paths.
My comfort level for being away from Doug is about 2.5–3 hours, so I always plan my business, meetings, and appointments around that window. You might wonder why. Well, let me share an example from today.
I volunteered at the Walk 2 End Alzheimer’s in Bend, knowing I wouldn’t be home until after noon. With Doug’s dementia, planning ahead is key. Before I left, I made him a sandwich, put it with some salad on a plate in the fridge, and set my phone alarm. At 11:45, I called him to guide him step-by-step: "Go to the fridge, open the door, grab your sandwich, and enjoy lunch." I love you and will be home about 12:30. Simple, right?
You’d think so, but when I got home, I checked the fridge, and there it was—his sandwich, untouched. This happens about 99% of the time. Unless I physically hand him the plate, he doesn’t eat.
I used to get frustrated, but I’ve learned something crucial: It’s the disease, not Doug. This has become my mantra, and it’s a constant reminder to take a deep breath and be patient.
This journey isn’t easy, but keeping that perspective helps.
Comments